the drive to sauzal
That morning, I drove like I always do, really fucking fast. Which in reality, in the Rabbit, probably was not all that fast, despite however it felt to me at the time.
I cut people off at every chance I got, and was stressed out by my car which didn’t much like third,2nd, 1rst, or 4th gear nor 5th in realityr. Not to mention the stress and anguish caused by tthe loud road sounds coming from my barely connected convertible top and silicon sealed windows. Tenia sus mañas mi carrito[1]
I don’t remember after that how the drive actually went, but it must have involved a lot of me honking, passing people illegally, and making a lot of noise in my mofle-less[2] car.
I got to Tavo’s house,, with him coming out somewhat hung-over and bitching about his dog Daisy(Rosita as I usually remember it to be named). Tavo came out outside to meet me and we left in his car.
Paragraph about neither of you ever having any gas and it always being an issue when you both wanted or had to go somewhere.
As we were going in his car to go surfing ahi en Rosarito, we had to fill his car with gas, y a lo mejor, ese manana, como muchos otros, con seguridad me dijo algo como; “vamos a tener que pusharle man because my car has NO gas!”[3], and so we probably pushed his car to the gas station down the street, filled up, then went back to my car to swap the rack, the surf boards, and my duffle bag.
Driving back to his car I remember how he never fixed his passenger seat. I met the guy at least two years ago now, and he had the same fucked up seat then. He probably still does now as a write this. If not in that particular car, perhaps in another faster monster of an early ‘90s auto asiatico. The front seat is stuck forward and vertical, so that not only are you crunched with the dashboard, but you’re sitting uncomfortably straight up.
“Tavo” le dije, “aun no arreglaste tu pinche seat[4]! fucking dumbass I don’t want to ride all the way to Rosarito in this shit.”
“Ahhhh shut up man, stop bitching, you’re like my dog” he replied.
“Stupidass[5]”
We pulled up next to my car then and the following occurred;
I took the stuff out of my car,
“Tavo, put the bag in your car, and I’ll put the roof racks and the boards on”
“Ok, simon, sure” o something link that me dijo[6]
That’s exactly how the conversation went, and I hold to my story, for important reasons which will become more apparent shortly.
At that time, I was still hungry, as I hadn’t had breakfast yet. Tavo knew a place nearby that I’d never been to, so we went.
We parked, sat down, and I instantly knew I would like the place. I think I got the machaca con huevos, and he got the chilaquiles, or vice versa, I don’t really remember. We had coffee too, and water . I paid for everything as I had just collected big claim from an insurance company when someone in the U.S. hit my truck while it was parked.
Walking back to the car now and…
“FUCK, Pinche Tavo wey donde esta mi bolsón[7]!?!?”
“Como que donde esta tu oooooo shit wey lo dejamos[8]!!”
“como que lo dejamos puto, TU lo dejaste ahí[9]”
He drove us really fucking fast back to his house.
The Meeting
En cuanto llega este wey con una cara de, estoy crudito dame agua y déjame usar tu baño pues primero lo primero y casi en el mismo orden, excepto que fue.
“Hey man how’s it going’? Hehehehehe you got a fuck up face”.
“I’m doing alright little bit hung-over”(con una voz mas aguardentosa que nada y con muy pocas ganas de intercambiar palabras). Y para acabarle me interrumpe:
“Man may I use your baño.”,
“Sure why not. Go ahead.”
Mientras espero mi café, que ya estaba listo le empiezo a retacar azúcar ensañado en una falsa creencia de que me iba a dar energía, el caso es que yo estaba crudo y quería azúcar. Al salir del baño el Facundo solo escucho:
“Man, give me some water.”
“Yeah man let me give u a glass.”
Al ver que ya estaba impacientado con ganas de largarse e ir a comer algo ya tuve que dejar ir la gran temida verdad:
“Hey man I don’t have much gas I think we might push the car.”
“As always.”
Juzgando por su cara de entre medio fastidio y desesperación, que cabe reconocer siempre me saca de apuros, por que no es raro que mi carro se quede sin gasolina, pero hey cabe mencionar que yo lo lleve al aeropuerto que como dije esa ya es otra historia. Y siempre lo ayude, bueno al menos trate.
Como era de suponer mi perra ladra como una loca despavorida prostituta a la cual no le pegaron, y pues le hicieron de todo un poco, (Cabe resaltar que me han contado).
Pues el Facundo pega un brinquito de lado, se vale decir que un tanto femenil el brinco encogiendo ambos brazos llevándoselos al pecho. Cuando en un intento por recuperar su virilidad dice:
“Fucking doggie, Pinché rosita no me ladres a mi putita”
“ Jejeje que gay”
Preparo mis cosas para echarlas en el carro y todo listo para un buen viaje matutino, emprendemos la marcha y cuando empiezo a calentar mi carro ese típico cascabeleo ya tan familiar para mí, solo escucho:
“ Nos quedamos sin gas wey”
“Pinche Tavo you suck man”
“I told you we might push it”
Al emprender a llenar el botecito de gasolina trate de no cruzar palabras, cosa que no hicimos, y, ya felices y contentos con la situación resuelta procedemos a comprar unas botellas de agua por que es una seria situación de resaca, y pues el agua es vida y ayuda a quitar la cruda, en eso pues el Facundo tiene que sacar la cartera de su maleta mas fea que la chingada, de cómo plástico azul.
Pero en fin mi situación financiera era crítica números rojos para todo incluso yo creo que si me hubieran hecho un examen de conteo de esperma no habría nada que contar, pero bueno alegremente acepte todo lo que viniera de el, que fue todo y pues al momento no me pareció importar y me sigue sin importar.
Después de sacar su cartera de su maleta pues entramos a la tiendita a comprar agua y donde sin más preámbulo decidimos ir a comer.
Me pregunto si conocía algún lugar donde había buena comida que creo recordar, fue algo así:
“Man u know a good place we can eat”
“Sure I know a place it’s a lonchería by the road”
[1] My car had its quirks.
[2] Without muffler
[3] “There in Rosarito we had to fill his car with gas, And quite probably, that morning, like many others, I’m sure he told me something like, were going to have to push it man….”
[4] Tabo, I said, you still haven’t fixed your seat?
[5] You
[6] He told me
[7] Fuck, fucking Tabo man, where’s my big-ass bag!
[8] What do you mean where is your….ooooo, shit man we left it!
[9] What do you mean we left it fagot, YOU left it there!
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